Mock Christmas letter

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Dear __________:

Ah…Christmas!  Time for the yearly Von Krank family update!  I know y’all keep on top of us via Facebook and Instagram, but who doesn’t love an in-depth letter you can treasure for years to come?  (That’s why I made this piece of correspondence totally frameable/scrapbookable with our family crest on the letterhead and 1000-thread count paper.)

So, Nick and I just celebrated our fifteenth wedding anniversary September 12th.  (Thank God it wasn’t the day before, right?!)  For our anni (which is crystal, FYI), he served me the most awesomesauce chocolate raspberry waffles in bed (among other things, if you know what I mean).  I not only have a hot husband, but a top chef.

Ashleigh, our oldest, just made the eighth-grade cheerleading squad and was crowned Miss Sea Oat (which is a beauty pageant, for those of you who don’t know about that sort of thing).  She also just started a green initiative at her school by getting all her classmates to sign a pledge to turn off the water when they brush their teeth.  It’s the little bitty things that add up to the great big things, you know!

Kimberleigh is very involved in softball and volleyball, and now she’s trying out for swimming.  She could have made the Olympic team, but alas, she much prefers the harp.  She’s already on her way to either Harvard or Carnegie Hall.  What a stressful decision that will be when the time comes!

The twins, Kellie and Joshie, continue to surprise us daily with their antics.  (I’m sure you’ve seen all the videos I’ve posted.)  I do believe they’ll become YouTube sensations one day!  I mean, seriously, strangers stop to watch them sometimes!  

And let me just throw in a little good news:  Nick got a promotion!  He is now the senior Vice President of Operations for the Hillsdale division of Laura Palmer handbags.  I get a brand-new bag every single month, but the ones that don’t quite fit me, I donate to the women’s shelter.  They have such a need, and I just love giving back!

As for me, I am utterly fulfilled being a stay-at-home mom and volunteering Saturday mornings at the soup kitchen to help feed all the little less fortunates.  They really are diamonds in the rough. Some of their signs are so clever, and oh, the stories some of them tell! I find myself wishing I lived a life half as exciting.  I have to be careful about helping them out too much, even though my heart goes out to them.  Got to pull yourselves up by your own bootstraps, you know!  What a tremendous responsibility it is to be good stewards of so much of God’s money.

I’m sorry we won’t be able to see all y’all this year, but we’ll be vay-caying (doesn’t that sound like Pig Latin?) in New Zealand so that our children will be exposed to another culture.  (They need a little diversity.)  We’ll be sure to keep you posted on all that, so you won’t miss a minute of it! We’ve become quite the world travelers, as of late.

God has truly blessed us!  Hope all y’all are doing even half as well as we are!  If you need anything at all, please just let us know, and we’ll be prayin’  for ya!

Happy holidays and an even happier New Year!

The Von Krank family

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