David had sacrificed marriage
& children of his own
to be with the woman he loved as a wife
& the girl he loved as a daughter.
But what he’d given up
would matter not,
for what he’d gotten
would change forms,
becoming that which he’d given up.
He hadn’t stayed for my mother,
he’d stayed for me,
&, I wondered—
did he,
like Rhett Butler,
see in Bonnie Blue,
the best part of Scarlett—
the true love of his life?
Mother had wanted to ship me off to B.Y.U.
to pursue my Mrs. degree
(except in Mormonism,
it was a Doctorate,
with concentrations in cooking,
cleaning,
& being attractive for your eternal companion).
She wanted to send me on a mission,
spreading the gospel–
anything to get rid of me–
which she believed would get me closer to the Church
& farther away from David,
but he had already prepared a room for me in his mansion.
For him, I’d been willing to give up my family,
but he hadn’t been willing to give up his Church.
For him, I’d have given up everything,
but he’d been willing to give up nothing.
The rib God had taken from Adam
to make Eve,
had made woman submissive to man,
for it was because of man,
that woman existed.
It was why men could have a career & family,
but women had to choose.